Coercive control, in plain English
Paste what was said. See the pattern.
Coercive control is rarely one dramatic moment. It's a slow pattern — being cut off, checked up on, made to feel guilty, told you remember things wrong. MendRii reads the words you paste and names the patterns it recognises, so you can decide what you think.
It does not diagnose anyone, it isn't legal or medical advice, and it doesn't decide anything about your relationship. That part is yours.
What MendRii looks for
Eleven patterns drawn from how coercive control is commonly described. Each one has a short lesson.
Isolation
Slowly cutting you off from other people.
Monitoring and surveillance
Checking, tracking, and needing to know where you are.
Financial control
Controlling money to control choices.
Guilt and obligation
Making your ordinary choices feel like a betrayal.
Reality-testing and denial
Rewriting what happened until you doubt your own memory.
Moving goalposts
The rules change so you can never quite get it right.
Threats and intimidation
Fear used as a way to get compliance.
Intensity cycles
Extremes of warmth and withdrawal that keep you off balance.
Degradation and criticism
Steady chipping away at how you see yourself.
Rules and permission-seeking
Adult life becomes something you need approval for.
DARVO (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender)
You raise a concern — and somehow end up apologising.
If you're worried right now
An app can help you name something. It can't assess your risk or help you plan. People whose whole job that is will talk to you confidentially, and you don't have to have decided anything.
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